Positive thoughts and musings to move forward on – important life lessons on this journey!

One of the things that I always focus on and find important to consider each and every day is looking for the good and the positive in my thoughts, feelings and how I act and treat other people.  All to often it seems people are keen to be negative about themselves, those around them or even just pass a negative comment on a range of things that they are not happy with.

Don’t get me wrong there are times when I feel like I want to focus on negative thoughts and feelings and not stay positive about someone or something…there are certainly a range of issues that make me stop and think and muse on how to put a positive spin on them and it does get quite difficult sometimes to do that.  But if you read my daily Facebook posts you will know that one of the things I attempt to do is to put a positive spin on anything and everything that is happening in life.


Over the past 25 years or so I have attempted in my life to always look for the positive in everything that happens.  I remember when I first went on my journey of learning about Reiki that I began to understand the power of positive energy and positive thoughts and the role that they can play in keeping you focused and looking forward.  On this journey that is my life I have been blessed to have many teachers who have been kind enough to share and instil their wisdom and life lessons on me.  Each and every one of them has enabled me to stay focused on what is important in life and have allowed me to see the purpose of life and that the learnings both good and bad make up the total of who I am.

Reflecting on these people, there are significant influencers who jump straight to the front of my mind – Denise Crundell was my Reiki teacher and took me on an incredible journey of self discovery and learning and her kind words and wisdom still influence me today.  Then there are the myriad of friends of mine who I have lost on this journey of mine to HIV over the past 30 years who were instrumental in being kind enough to share the wonder of their lives, even though for some it was a very short time – Francis Hecker, Paul Evans, Neville Tillet, Shaun, Frank, Robbie, Steve and so many others.  Each of them had much dignity and fearlessness and I was blessed to be able to spend some incredible moments with them for which I will always remember.

Then there are the many women who have been major influencers in my life, who continue to shine their lights brightly on me and make me thankful each day for their presence in my life.  It is interesting that sometimes it can be may months or year between visits but their joy, their love and their energy is always present.  And even though they have had their own struggles and major obstacles on their journey, their inherent positivity allows me to remained focussed on my way forward.  Jo Watson, Rochelle Coombes, Ruth Marshall, Verity James, Sally Rowell, Aly May, Annette Hasluck, Nola McMullan, Trish Langdon, Trudy Matthews are just a few of the women who have played a major role and who have always accepted me for who I am and supported my choices on this journey of mine.

My partner of the past nearly 32 years has always been and is still my rock, my anchor and my best friend.  He is always there through all the good, the bad and the beautiful.  We have shared and will continue to share so many amazing things and I wake up each morning thankful to be blessed to have him in my life.  He really is my one true love!

Children and grandchildren are the most grounding elements around!  Their ability to see things clearly and to accept you warts and all is always a joy to behold.  Their unrelenting love lifts my soul daily and adds to the complete picture of who I am.  The simple things like a laugh, a hug, sitting reading a story together or going for a walk are moments that get etched in my mind and fill me with wonder and joy each and every day.

It is funny but over the last couple of days I have spent a bit of time remembering my Dad, who passed away just over 2 years ago.  It is funny the little things that remind you or twig a memory of someone who has been a significant influence in your life and the lessons that he taught in their role on your journey and your role on theirs.  His light continues to shine for me and his love is carried forever in my heart. I tend not to get too maudlin or distressed about this and I think perhaps having gone through so many years of the HIV epidemic that I always attempt to look for the positive in the ending of a life and not to dwell on the sadness for too long because if I did I think I would end up focussing on this and that is one of the many lessons that I have learnt and that is to look for the beauty in the person who has now left and remember the wonder, the joy, the laughter and the love that they shared with me and bought into my life…this allows me to keep them close but to let go of the sadness.


In a world that is constantly filled with deep, dark and depressing news, critiques and comments I find it better in my life to try to stay focussed on the finding the wonder and the light and the joy and the love in each situation.  I believe that if we all focussed more on the positive more then to quote the cliché the world would be a better place.   I know it might be looking at the world through rose-coloured glasses but it is what has helped to get me to where I am today and so if you don’t mind I will continue on this path and continue to learn life lessons from those who I encounter on my journey and hope that in some small way I can also give to theirs.

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